Hiatus

I will be taking a break from BehindTheZ for the next three months, mainly because I will be spending most of my time in internet-free places, and wouldn't be able to keep a regular schedule of updates. I might post some texts from time to time, but 'Animals that don't Exist' will be on hold until I get back. We'll see how it goes on from there.

To all you people who read this blog regularly, and to all those who just drop by from time to time, thanks a bunch!

And see you soon!

Animals that don't Exist

The Eternal Goose

The eternal goose, Anser invictus, is a close cousin of the bar-headed goose. Breeding annually in the high plateaus of the Himalaya, the birds spend most of the year flying at extremely high altitudes. Several eye-witnesses have reported sightings of the geese from commercial airliners from all over the world.

Scientists have been interested in the eternal goose for a long time, especially the mechanisms that allow it to fly at heights of up to 10'000 meters (~33'000 feet), and the selective pressures that have pushed them to choose this lifestyle. In recent years, the geese have been tracked year round, and the data obtained showed that the animals were even more amazing than thought at first.

If before it was believed that 10'000 meters was their maximum altitude, it has now been shown that it is in fact their cruising altitude. Indeed, after their short reproductive period, the animals will fly off, quickly reaching their cruising altitude, at which they will remain until it is time to breed again.

Analysis of flight routes, as well as wind patterns, show that the geese, once they reach their desired height, barely have to make any effort at all. The wind currents will simply let them glide along, until, nine months later, they once again arrive at their breeding grounds. While the birds are at high altitude, they reduce their metabolism to a minimum, consuming almost no energy at all. The cold of the upper reaches of the atmosphere, combined with a special protein that prevents ice-crystals from forming, helps prevent cellular damage. And of course, the high altitude makes sure that they are safe from most, if not all, predators.

Due to the fact that they spend most of their time in a form of suspended hibernation, eternal geese are among the most long-lived animals on the planet. How long exactly they can live has not yet been determined, because since the studies begun, over sixty years ago, most of the animals that survived their first year have stayed alive.

Today, however, the geese face a growing threat from climate change. The changes in temperatures provoked by global warming affect the air currents, and leave the geese either caught up in the gales, and unable to descend at their destination, or stranded in unfamiliar lands at irregular intervals. Wether this will cause the extinction of the species, or allow them to colonize new habitats, remains to be seen.

Mountaintops

Today is the day. The one. Long awaited. Reunion.
There are some thing you can only understand if you feel them. And there are some things you can only imagine if you see them. White poweder on the mountaintops.

Ride on!

Animals that don't Exist

The Dead Bird

It just lies there...

Animals that don't Exist

The Two-legged Pig

The two-legged pig, Sus duocruris, is a relatively new member to the Sus genus, which encompasses all pigs. But despite its young age, it has already had a large impact on our society, as most of us are aware of.

The two-legged pig is a master of disguise, and can easily pass for human from a distance. This is essential for its survival, since it inhabits almost exclusively urban areas. In cases where its true identity has been spotted, two-legged pigs are chased out of town, or, in more extreme cases, gutted, hamstrung, and then fried, boiled or salted, depending on local customs. The reasons for this anger is obvious if we take a closer look at the behavior of two-legged pigs.

Instead of rummaging through trashcans or depending on leftovers, the two-legged pig is a master swindler, and a great orator. Thanks to its ability to mimick human behavior, and its astute powers of observation, it can easily adopt behavior that puts human spectators at ease, and, in the long run, diminishes their brain-activity. Once the victim is thus entranced, the two-legged pig will then proceed, through visual and audio cues playing to the human unconscious, to relieve its crowd of most of its belongings (the two-legged pig prefers cash, but, as most members of its genus, will get whatever it can, whenever it can).

The population size of the two-legged pig is hard to estimate, due to its camouflage, but scientists believe it is growing steadily. Worst-case scenarios have been presented where models estimate that by the end of the 21^st century, two-legged pigs will outnumber humans in political and financial roles. How to stop the rise of the two-legged pig, however, remains open for debate. While some are in favor of encouraging education (which will make it easier to see through the two-legged pig's charade), others advocate genetic tests on all members of risk groups, to make sure they are indeed human, and not two-legged pigs. Others still insist that the two-legged pig is myth, and no cause for concern. A member of the latter group has recently been gutted, hamstrung, and grilled, to the delight of pig-haters and barbeque enthusiasts alike.

For a more detailed description of the evolution and behavior of the two-legged pig, please refer to George Orwell's “Animal Farm”, which remains one of the seminal works on the subject.

Snow

White is falling form the white skies. The first time this year it comes in great numbers, covering the view outside my window with a fluffy blanket of cold cotton. The night grows light as the white mantle descends on the land.
On the morning already it is melting fast, sucking the warmth out of the cold air. It drops and dribbles, nibbles at the stone it kisses. Softly the cold lips take what the may and disappear. Here, at least.
Elsewhere, I am sure, the solid clouds of ivory will keep the land hidden for much longer. Time to grab my board.

Animals that don't Exist

The Dark Fly

The dark fly, Anopheles caligatus, does not get its name from its color, which is, in fact, a light grey. Rather, it is due to its preferred habitat. Just as the dark fly is not a fly, but a mosquito.

The dark fly lives mainly in the caves of Southern Europe, although some colonies have been found as far north as Bergen, in Norway, and others as far south as the Atlas mountains in Morocco. Although many mosquito species fly in swarms during the mating season to improve chances of reproduction and as a defense mechanism against predators, the behavior is more pronounced in dark flies, and for good (evolutionary) reasons.

Living in caves, they often share their habitat with bats. Dark flies emit a strong odour that repels the nightly mammals, but only if they can gather in big enough swarms for the smell to reach a certain threshold. Otherwise, the bats will trade off the slight dipleasure for a juicy meal. However, it has been observed on mutlitple occasions that, whenever a swarm of dark flies manages to settle in a cave, it will soon drive out the bats. Indeed, Dr. Hugo Forsher, from the German Institute of Reverse Displacement (DIVV, Deutsches Institut der Verkehrten Verscheuchung), believes that dark flies are one of the main causes for dwindling bat populations in Europe today.

The fact that dark flies ar drawn to darkness, and not light, is an as-of-yet unexplained curiosity. This behavior has driven the mosquitoes into caves, where the low visibility and intense echoes make communications through sound and sight impractical. Because of this, dark flies have a very pronounced olfactive sense. It is believed that there is not a place in Europe from where a dark fly would not be able to find the nearest colony of its fellows.

Although they rarely come into contact with humans due to their living preferences, a few cases have been reported where people venturing into caves inhabited by dark flies have had so much of their blood sucked that their lives where in jeopardy. What the mosquitoes eat when no humans are present is not yet know, altough scientists believe their diet must consist mainly of small mammals that wander into their territory. None of them went to check, though.